life, thoughts

Accepting Betrayal (200-word Tuesday)

Deep thoughts today.

The character, Ava, in my novel, Whit’s End, learns something nefarious about someone she loves that she is forced to face. She either has to remove herself from that person’s life or rework that relationship.

What if I told you that someone you cared about and trusted had committed some ugly, dubious act? Would you believe me? Would you confront the person and get the truth from them? If you did confront them, what if they told you I was lying?

It would make sense for you to believe the person you’ve long cared about and trusted instead of me. What if I then provided factual evidence that the person you trusted was involved in misconduct? Would you confront your friend with the evidence? What if they lied and said the evidence was manufactured? What do you do then?

A person in this situation may feel confused and betrayed. They might go into safe-mode and deny the facts forever. Or, they’d come into acceptance after the five stages of grief.

What would you do? Would you be able to eventually accept the bad news, or remain in denial because the emotions might prove too difficult?



20 thoughts on “Accepting Betrayal (200-word Tuesday)”

  1. After reading all the comments and replies, I do not think I have anything to add of value. I read what you wrote twice to make sure I understood what you were saying. Apparently, someone has betrayed your trust and you do not know why.

    I always answer this question of “why” with “there is no answer to why”. Life is what it is.

    At my age, the why’s have a little cubby hole to reside in to be reviewed if I choose to make myself upset again because I cannot understand the why. My example is: “Why did my son’s wife leave him to die by himself?”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Linda. It’s not that someone betrayed me. It’s that there are lies being told and people defend those lies because they refuse to see the truth. In defending the liars, they purposely hurt those who are defending truth. I don’t know if that makes any sense. It seems to cause trouble in relationships and our world. JMO.

      Thanks for sharing from the heart. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I read this twice now, and have thought about it a bit. Living in denial doesn’t sound like a good thing. Then a person would be repressing a truth all the time, and that’s got to hurt deep inside. It seems like life is always dishing up something challenging, and to bravely face it can (eventually) bring peace and acceptance. Truth, though, is such a tricky thing. I don’t believe in an absolute truth (except maybe in an absolute sense, lol). Everybody sees the world through such unique eyes that everyone’s truth is going to be different. And we have no idea what different interpretations are going on inside a person’s head. It could look like a person was living in denial (from our perspective) but from inside their head they could have come to a peace and acceptance. Who knows?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’ve had literally so many people misunderstand and misjudge me over the years because they have no idea what’s going on inside this mind. Their world view is just too different. They see actions and interpret them from their cultural mind-frame and it’s so far from the “truth” that I see…

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Hi Kathy. I appreciate your thoughtful response. When I was going through that very deep seeking spiritual time in my life (as you know we both found truth in Oneness), I didn’t believe in absolute truth either. I have since changed my mind. I think there are some (very few) absolutes we can’t avoid due to the nature of the yin and yang on this plain. This exempts perspectives though. We each see from our own view of the world.

      I guess this topic came up because I’ve been hurt by people who have defended some nasty behavior, because they’ve closed their eyes to it. They couldn’t see the truth. It may keep them happy in their own lives, but it hurts others when they defend it.

      As far as being misunderstood. I completely understand. 😉 My family used to say to me, “you always have to have the last word.” That really wasn’t what I was trying to do (misunderstood again). I was trying to get them to understand me, which meant I was trying too hard and kept going. I’ve always felt misplaced in this world. As a child, it made for loneliness sometimes. As an adult, I feel sort of community-less. But, I kind of like that I don’t just blend in. However, it does feel wonderful on those rare occasions that I am understood.

      Thank you for sharing your perspective. As a fellow “misunderstood,” I will always look to understand you, and I think I do. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I would have to know the truth – whatever the consequences. That is just who I am but I understand for some it might be easier to ignore the facts and carry on regardless. Difficult soul-searching questions raised here by you, Lori and it’s been interesting to read your comments.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Annika. I would need to know the truth regardless of consequences, too. Something just dawned on me as I was responding to L. Marie. I have experienced people who won’t face the truth and help to defend a lie. That can be hurtful to those who know the truth.

      Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

      Liked by 2 people

  4. That’s a tough one. I agree with Jill’s advice. I would prayerfully confront the person who came to me with that news. What is that person’s involvement in the alleged incident?

    My family has had to deal with some very tough situations, thanks to the actions of other family members. So I’ve definitely been in this situation. The truth always comes out.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So true, L. The truth does eventually come out. I’ve just known so many who hide from it. I suppose it’s okay if they are happy. But, my experience is that people who haven’t faced the truth, often are hurting others in their defense of the continued lie.

      Sounds like you’ve overcome some tough family situations yourself. Thank you for sharing.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I don’t know what I’d do because there are a lot of variables involved, but it’s a tough situation for sure. I guess I’d hunt for the truth as best I could. And then maybe work it into my fiction. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m one who needs to know the “why” of a thing. I know too many people who can’t face the truth, and I don’t understand it. My MIL was like that. But yes, working it into the fiction is a great idea. I did some of that with Ava. Thanks for answering, Carrie.

      Liked by 2 people

  6. We all make bad choices, poor decisions and also sometimes can just be completely awful, so I would need to understand the why of it. Finding out something horrible about someone you’re intimate with can be devastating, but depending on what it is, it doesn’t necessarily have to be the end of the relationship.

    Good question.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I like this answer, thanks, Lynette. I’m one who likes to know the “why” of things, too. I’ve just seen too many people close their eyes to the truth, and I don’t understand it.

      Liked by 2 people

  7. First, I would question your motive for telling me and why you didn’t approach the person to suggest they tell me this hurtful news instead of you. Beyond that, I agree with Anelli, no matter the hurt, the truth is should be addressed.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Good answer, Jill. I’ve seen so many people I know close their eyes to the truth, and I don’t understand it. My MIL used to be that way and it would drive me nuts when she couldn’t see what was right in front of her.

      Liked by 1 person

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