I don’t know how to do it. I have no idea how to function in chaos. I’m terrible in an emergency. I don’t know how to explain it, but my brain doesn’t connect the dots in disorganization. My mind freezes. You may have figured this out about me when I wrote about getting a call that my husband had an accident.
The only way I can function is when things are organized and planned out. I had to have been born this way, or have some sort of OCD, because I do not know how to move forward in disorder. I’m not in any way exaggerating, and I’m a bit ashamed of it. I feel useless in a crisis.
A few of weeks ago, I wrote about finding calm in that inner “sweet spot,” but in hectic situations, I completely forget that spot exists.
In recent posts, I wrote that I might not be around the blogging world for a bit, but I’ve still been around. The reason is because what was supposed to happen was postponed by a couple of weeks.
I was going to blog about all of the chaos ready to ensue in my life, but I don’t want to make this into a complaint post. It’s more about not being able to function when so much is happening at once, and wishing I knew how to better cope. I get frustrated with myself for panicking.
Briefly, we bought a house which needs remodeling. Have to pack and move while I have treatment for a pain condition. I have a surgery coming up on my hand. We’d also like to find time to help both of our mothers with the health issues they are experiencing. All within the next six weeks.
I started working to get my novel ready for Kindle Scout and re-releasing my memoir anthology, but now I’m sad that those things will be left by the wayside until things settle down.
Blogging actually brings me some peace of mind, because I enjoy it, but unfortunately I won’t have the time for a while. I have future posts of inspirational readings scheduled to go up, because I enjoy lifting spirits, but comments will be closed (in the future, not today).
Hope to hang out with you all again soon. For now, feel free to respond to my desperate questions below.
How are you when things are hectic and disorganized? Can you keep a calm head and grab the bull by the horns, or do you freeze and not know where to turn (like me)? Do you have any helpful tips to help me unfreeze my brain, besides “take deep breaths” as I’m hyperventilating?
I guess I have my father’s “calmness in emergencies” I can get quite cranky but I’m generally calm. I enjoyed reading your post! Thanks for sharing 🙂
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I’m popping into the blog world irregularly but am thinking of you. Happy you found a house but sorry you are amidst chaos and sadness. Even though travelling my thoughts are of my other community of blogger friends.
What do I do? I cry, I yell… and make myself feel worse then I make lists and get on with it. In the evenings drink some wine, have a nice dinner and a decent night sleep if possible.
💖
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How nice to read a comment from you. Thank you for the great suggestions. In case you didn’t read my post today, I did cry last night. I couldn’t take it anymore and I let it out. I’ve been moving forward better today as a result. I also like the wine suggestion. Hope you’re having a wonderful trip.
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Yeah, I shut down when things get too chaotic (or even a little chaotic). I totally get it. Send lotsa love! ❤
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Yeah, I need order. Thanks for sharing and for your support.
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Some people say they thrive on chaos. I just can’t wrap my head around that…
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Lori, I don’t deal well with too much uncertainty. When my schedule is chaotic, I get very thrown off. One thing that helps me is lists. Keeping a list of what has to be done today and what has to be done this week and next month. If I plan out what I can plan out that helps me feel more in control. It’s okay to not be able to do it all. Sometimes I take to my bed for a day and call in sick to life. It helps me to just stay still and watch tv or read and just give myself a day off in the chaos. Also, doing one thing helps me feel less paralyzed by it all. Hugs and hope the surgery helps your pain. 🙂
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Hi Kourtney. Thanks for sharing what works for you. You know, I’m learning from you and others that I’m actually doing the best I can to keep up. I also keep lists. I even spread them out for each day. If something doesn’t get done, I put it on the next day’s list. I’ve even taken a couple 1/2 days here and there to relax, like you said, but then I feel guilty. So, I’m thinking I should cut myself some slack and not be so hard on myself.
Since I posted this, my hand surgery is canceled. I don’t have time for it, and it’s not something pertinent, so I may wait until next year. But, we’ve gotten some bad news about my mother-in-law’s health. She lives 1,100 miles away and with the remodel and moving, this is so hard.
Thank you so much for your hugs and well wishes. The support is always welcome.
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If you have any opportunity to go to a gentle yoga class – DO IT. When things get chaotic around me, my usually zen self forgets to breathe and I stop finding the time to stretch and relax. But all of that comes back to me in a yoga class. The other way is through a long solitary walk. Where, by the way, I LISTEN (and never wear ear buds for music, etc.). Listening to the bird sounds, the trees rustling, the soft drum rock of my feet hitting pavement or dirt, is relaxing, soothing, and brings peace. Good luck to you!
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Hi Pam. I have about 20 gentle yoga routines on CD and I do one every morning. With my joint/pain issues, I need to do it to get moving. I also do a walk with the dog each day. I too, listen to the sounds. Listening makes it even better when I’m with Max (the dog). So, I guess I’m on the right track. I keep reminding my husband we have to take these breaks, because he’ll never stop. But, I do forget to breathe throughout the chaos, and I’ll try to remember to stop and do that. Thank you so much for reading, sharing and the good luck wishes.
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❤
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Good luck with all you have to face over the next few weeks Lori. In a crisis, all I’ve ever done is put one foot in front of the other and dealt with it that way (and spent some quiet time watching the river twinkling in the dark).
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Hi Andrea. I do like to take breaks in the silence, but my husband wants to keep us ever moving. I’m taking a break now though, and glad to see you. Hope you are well. Thanks for the good wishes.
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Everyday is hectic for me, so it’s nothing new. Lol.
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I know. I don’t know how you do it. I get freaked just reading about all you do. 😛
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I think some people appear to be tough under pressure but inside their head may be a different story.
Chaos exhausts me because I do like routine, but as we all know, life has some curve balls in store. I can sympathize with home remodeling stress, going through that right now and it has been very frustrating process so far. And of course, I understand all too well about ailing parents. Most of us are far stronger and adaptable than we give ourselves credit for, so don’t be too tough on yourself.
Hope your surgery goes well!
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Thank you for this very thoughtful comment, Joy. I appreciate the soothing words.
Good luck with your remodeling. Hope things go smoothly for you.
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It’s a control issue, Lori. And we keep thinking that we, in the human experience, are the ones in control when it is, in fact, the Divine Being within. So, how about this short exercise?
Breathe in… I am a Divine Being having a human experience
Breathe out… God shows the way where I see none
Repeat for 3 breaths in and 3 breaths out. Then move along… When chaos threatens to overwhelm you again, repeat the practice. In time, with practice, it’s possible to slip into the practice seamlessly and automatically.
It’s one of my go-to tools for finding order in chaos. 😀 xoxoxoM
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This is a wonderful suggestion, Margarita. If my brain doesn’t freeze to the point where I can’t even remember your go-t0 tool, I will definitely use this approach. Thank you for sharing it.
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You’re welcome, Lori! The trick is to practice with seemingly small things (the Universe actually knows no magnitude, that’s a human concept) so you can make a habit that can support you when you need it. I’ve found it worth the effort, my dear friend! xoxoM
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There is always comfort in the creative process, isn’t there. As the Brits say, “Keep calm and write on.” Or maybe it is “carry on.” I always get those two confused.
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Keep calm. Ha. Okay. Thanks for reading about my OCD, Robin. 😛
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What Jill said.
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I know, right? 😀
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I thrive in my routine and orderly world, but when unexpected happenings occur, I can get cranky. 🙂 As I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned to adjust and not let them control my happiness. Just keep moving forward, Lori. One day you’ll look at this time as not such a big deal, at least that’s what seems to happen for me.
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Routine and orderly, that’s me. Thanks for the wise words, Jill.
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